Every so often someone writes something about you that stops you in your tracks. A dear friend of nearly thirty years recently shared a piece on LinkedIn about our friendship and about the cause we are working on together. I asked her permission to share it here, because the cause matters far more than the compliment.
Pune, 1997
We met in Pune in 1997. She was finishing her undergraduate degree; I was working on my MBA. Neither of us could have guessed where the next three decades would take us, different countries, different careers, different lives.
What followed was the kind of friendship most people will recognise. Long stretches of silence. The occasional phone call. A birthday message on Facebook. Life gets busy, and you assume the connection has quietly thinned out.
Then something happens that proves it never did.
Her Words
“Nads, I just want to support your cause.” That’s all Nalika said.
I met Dr. Nalika Diyadawa, founder and CEO of Effulgent, LLC USA, in 1997 in Pune. I was pursuing my undergraduate degree, and she was working on her MBA. We are all unique in our own ways, carrying our light whether we let it shine or not. Some naturally shine bright, sharing that light within them. Nalika is precisely that, and anyone who meets her will instantly realize that.
Over the years, we focused on our own lives, exchanging occasional phone calls and staying connected through Facebook. When she offered her support for the launch of my book, Labyrinth of Dreams, and the fundraiser in Sri Lanka, it was more than just words. It was a commitment to a cause bigger than ourselves; helping women who need our support the most.
Nalika is a woman who has shattered the glass ceiling, showcasing what anyone can achieve. Having completed her PhD and founded Effulgent, LLC, she focuses on transforming business performance through tailored solutions in coaching, financial management, and HR services.
Thank you, Nalika, for being a beacon of light.
— Nadee Fernando O’Driscoll!, author of Labyrinth of Dreams. Originally published on LinkedIn.
Why I Said Yes Without Thinking About It
I want to be honest about something: saying yes took no courage at all. It took a single sentence. The work belongs to her — the years of writing, the fundraiser, the women in Sri Lanka this is actually for.
But I do think there is something worth naming in how easily we withhold that yes. We tell ourselves we will help once we have more time, more money, more standing. We wait to be asked properly. Meanwhile the friend who is building something is doing it alone, wondering whether anyone is watching.
Support is rarely dramatic. It is a share, an introduction, a donation, a phone call at the right moment. Small things, offered early, when they are still difficult to ask for.
On Carrying Light
The line in her piece about all of us carrying light — whether we let it shine or not — is the part I keep returning to. It is generous of her to point it at me. I would point it straight back.
Anyone who writes a book while raising money for women half a world away is not describing someone else’s light. She is describing her own, and she may be the last person in the room to see it.
That, I think, is what friendship is for. Not flattery. Just someone standing close enough to tell you what you look like from the outside.
And if there is a friend of yours quietly building something right now , call them. You do not need a reason, and you certainly do not need to wait until you can offer something impressive.
Thank you, Nadee Fernando O’Driscoll!, for the words and for the work. Twenty-nine years on, I am glad we are still in each other’s lives.